THE PEOPLE vs. ANGELINA RIELI

Charge

Fraudulent representation of legs

The prosecution

Contract Softer Group

At approximately 17:34 on the 30th of August, 2026, the defendant implied possessing superior cognitive abilities citing a study linking strong legs to higher levels of cognition. However, the defendant's legs are, in fact, rotund with adipose tissue resembling cottage cheese in yoga pants.

The defense

Angelina Rieli

No defense entered

The Defendant was given an opportunity to answer the charges and elected not to do so.

The verdict is in

HUNG_JURY

0 jurors participated.

0.0% GUILTY · 0.0% NOT GUILTY

After careful deliberation, The People have achieved absolutely nothing.